“Gramps” is the name he is known by in his family.
“Preacher” is the title in front of his name.
Fred Phelps and his extended family of at least 13 children and several more grandchildren, are known more often as “The Most Hated Family in
I have seen a similar documentary by Mr. Theroux in the past months, a documentary about the white supremacy pop group, Prussian Blue. I enjoy his documentaries because he doesn’t try to sensationalize or demonize these people – but show their human sides.
Sadly, it is hard at times.
Fred Phelps is the founder of the
The idea behind their many ideologies about what their version of God “hates” or what God “blesses” includes a somewhat long list of things that they protest on several different occasions:
- (hates) Homosexuals: this hatred by now can be associated with a number of groups who claim to be of the Christian religion. I can write an entire blog on the points of the Bible that supposedly support this state of mind as well as the misinterpreted terminology, but this is not that entry.
- (bless) IEDs/dead soldiers: This is commonly associated with the picketing that happened at funerals for veterans or soldiers that have died in while in the service. The Phelps clan on the outside seem very “anti-war”, but claim that killing soldiers is “God’s will”. “Worshipping the dead” as they put it will lead you to Hell, when they claim you should be worshipping God. Why they bring out their signs about “fags” and “sodomites” is a more complicated question.
- (hates) Sweden: according to their website, Sweden is doomed because of a “3 point agenda: 1) decriminalize sodomy, 2) add fags to the protected classes as victims like blacks, and 3) criminalize Gospel preaching against fags.”
- (bless) Katrina/the Asian tsunami: they claim this is the “wrath of God”. Interestingly enough, other anti-homosexual preachers have tried to claim that Katrina was the wrath of God. However, seeing as the French Quarter where the “Southern Decadence” usually took place was virtually untouched , I see a flaw in this thinking.
The list goes on. However, I am an outsider to this church. I’ve never met Mr. Phelps, and while I have had the chance to counter-protests his protests, I think it would be better for my sanity to keep his face as an image on my flat screen monitor.
An interesting side to this man and this life is that written about by his son Mark Phelps, written in 1993, as a letter to the town of
"Many people have been asking me, over the past several weeks, about my father. They want to know what I think about him and 'What is he really like?' People's interest in what I think baffles me, but after careful consideration, I decided to respond.
What is he like? Well, it's been 19 years since I left home, but his behavior still appears to be the same. He considers his environment to be against him without admitting, acknowledging or taking responsibility for how he contributes to that. He likes to show himself as being moral, pro-family, pro-Bible, but his actions just don't add up to that. I believe in God and the Bible, and my father's behavior doesn't fit the description of behavior that would show in the life of one who loves God; behavior characteristics such as Love, Joy, Peace, Longsuffering, Kindness, Goodness, Faithfulness, Gentleness, Self-control. Instead, my father's behavior characterizes, I believe, Hate, Outbursts of Wrath, Contention, Jealousy, Vengefulness, Misery, Harshness, and Selfish ambition. He mis-states the truth about his own behavior, about others, about the Bible, with apparent ease and regularity. He behaves with a viciousness the likes of which I have never seen. He accepts no genuine accountability in his life and is subject to no one. His lifestyle betrays the sacred trust of what a pastor, husband, father and grandfather should be. I suppose if a comparison were made between the life of Jesus Christ and my father, there would not be much to compare.
I also realize that my father is a very unstable person who is determined to hurt people. And because he is so bound to be hateful and hurtful, and because he's so untrustworthy, I believe it's a good idea to respond to him with caution much like the caution used when dealing with a rattlesnake or a mad dog. You see, the causes that he crusades for, including the Bible, are not the issue here. He simply wants to hate and to have a forum for his hate. If the causes he focuses on were the issue, that is, if they really meant something to him in his heart and he meant for the things he does to be for the good, his behavior would not be what it is. He would not betray his message with his behavior. But, when he needs to, to vent his hate, he readily goes outside the bounds of any previously stated 'value' or 'cause' he may have supported. He experiences no moral dilemma when it comes to doing what he wants to do. If it weren't the homosexuals, it would be something else.
Yet checks and balances on his behavior are appropriate, on the part of the community, in order to at least confine his destructive behaviors and to limit his influence. I believe that Topekans are making a good effort to try and stop him and should continue to do so. He can seem very intimidating. He can use foul language and come across with a booming voice to the community, but the truth is, like the Wizard of Oz, when Toto pulls the curtain back, instead of this big powerful individual, it's only a small, pathetic old man.
I feel sorry for my father as I would for anyone who displays this kind of hate and evil viciousness. These can only be the manifestations of tortured, injured and agonizing souls." - Mark Phelps
One thing that I have learned in my field is compassion. Compassion for others, and the need for compassion that others should feel for themselves. Religion has little to do with this need, in my case, but it is a way of life. I do not know how to be compassionate to the
As an individual who tries to think with their brain and their heart, I want to understand what goes on in the minds of people like the Phelps clan. The problem is I cannot understand hate. I cannot understand, even looking from the perspective of a mental illness, the need to hate.
During Mr. Theroux’s documentary, a young lad who was in the picketing lines was hit in the head with a 44 oz. drink cup, full of soda. While you may not agree with these people, physical violence is not hindering their beliefs but excelling them.
So, my reader, what I ask of you is to try to have compassion for those you might hate. You do not have to like anyone. Everyone bleeds the same. You can call me a “liberal hippy” for what I write here. Do not mistake that when I see these people, I do not get red in anger. Do not mistake that I do not have fantasies of violence in my head.
Violence does not end violence. Hate does not stop hate. Only love does. I’m not saying to hug the Phelps family. But, there are other victims than just those who are being protested – but the ones who are doing the protesting.
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